Lessons
Grammar foundation #1
Nepali pronouns and honorifics — why you must learn this first
Nepali has three different words for “you,” and choosing the wrong one can range from charmingly over-polite to genuinely insulting. Master this single distinction and you have already cleared the biggest cultural hurdle in Nepali. Everything else — verbs, postpositions, sentence order — comes after.
The full three-tier pronoun table
Nepali pronouns are genderless — ऊ means both “he” and “she.” Gender, when needed, surfaces in the verb ending, not the pronoun.
| Person | Devanagari | Romanized | English | Level | Use |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1st singular | म | ma | I | — | The speaker. Genderless — same word for he-speaker or she-speaker. |
| 1st plural | हामी | haami | we | — | We / us. No honorific distinction in first person. |
| 2nd low | तँ | ta~ | you (low) | LOW | Intimate: children, animals, very close friends from childhood. NEVER use with strangers — it is insulting. |
| 2nd mid | तिमी | timi | you (mid) | MID | Friends, younger colleagues, people you know well. Equivalent to French 'tu' between peers. |
| 2nd high | तपाईं | tapaai~ | you (high) | HIGH | Default for every tourist interaction. Strangers, shopkeepers, guides, elders. Always safe. |
| 3rd low | ऊ | u | he / she (low) | LOW | Peers, inferiors, or someone not present. Genderless — context tells you which. |
| 3rd mid | उनी | uni | he / she (mid) | MID | Medium respect — a colleague, a neighbour you know. |
| 3rd high | उहाँ | uhaa~ | he / she (high) | HIGH | Elders, monks, officials, anyone deserving high respect. |
The tourist's safe default: तपाईं
If you remember nothing else from this page, remember this: default to तपाईं (tapaai~) for every adult you don't already know. Shopkeepers, taxi drivers, guides, hosts, elders, monks, officials — all of them get तपाईं. Using it with a child is mildly over-formal but never offensive. Using a lower form with the wrong person is.
When to use तिमी
तिमी (timi) is the mid-level “you” — used between friends, with younger colleagues, and with people you know well. It maps roughly onto French “tu” in peer-to-peer use.
- A trekking guide you've known for a week and who has invited you to call him by name.
- A village child (school-aged) who is talking to you on the trail.
- A friend made at a Pokhara guesthouse you're still in touch with.
When in doubt, stay with तपाईं until the other person signals they'd like to drop the formality.
Why तँ is off-limits for tourists
तँ (ta~) is the low form. Within a family, a parent might use it with a small child. Between very old friends from childhood, it can be a sign of warmth. Between a stranger and a stranger, it's a slap. There is no situation in which a tourist should use तँ with an adult. Even if you hear locals using it, you cannot — the relationship behind that usage isn't yours yet.
Plurals: just add -हरू
To pluralise a second- or third-person pronoun, attach the suffix -हरू (-harū).
तिमीहरू
timiharū — you all (mid)
तपाईंहरू
tapaai~harū — you all (high)
उनीहरू
uniharū — they (mid)
उहाँहरू
uhaa~harū — they (high)
First-person plurals use the dedicated pronoun हामी (haami) — they don't take -हरू.
Five-scenario pronoun quiz
1. You are addressing a 60-year-old shop owner in Thamel. Which pronoun should you use?
2. A 7-year-old boy in a village asks where you're from. Pick the most natural pronoun for him.
3. You've spent two weeks trekking with a guide your own age. He's now a friend. Which form fits?
4. You meet a senior Buddhist monk at Boudha. Which form is appropriate?
5. A stranger on the street asks for directions. Default to:
Next: the verbs that match each pronoun
Each pronoun pulls a different verb ending behind it. Once you know the pronouns, the verb tables are short and memorable.